Sunday, April 16, 2006
My Neighbor
My neighbor came over to say hello. Me being the industrious gal that I am I asked him to help me lift up my mattress in order to place a freshly washed bedskirt on the boxspring. It's such a waste of time anyway because I have hardwood floors and the dustballs form in a matter of seconds after I sweep. They manage to cling on to the cotton, so I have to wash the darn thing all over again. But if I don't have a bedskirt, you'll be able to see the boogie-dust monster underneath and he likes his privacy. Now this neighbor of mine tends to drop by unannounced, which is probably not proper etiquette for a gentleman trying to impress a lady. Maybe I'm no lady... I just assume all men try to impress (anything in a [bed]skirt) as best they can, so of course he complied with my request. We are both standing against the wall of the bedroom/living room that is a complete mess thanks to my bright idea of Spring cleaning on NY's first gorgeous weekend. I straighten out the sheet. Then he grabs my arm and kisses me on the cheek. Really he was shooting for my lips...twice! You can imagine the shock. I took a wild guess and asked in between giggles, "I thought you were seeing someone?" Much to my surprise he responded, "I am." What the ^&*%(!? He apologized about 7 times before he left my apartment. Did I give him some kind of signal that says, hey I'd like someone with a girlfriend (of 4 years!) to f*** me tonight?" Jeeez. Maybe he's no gentleman...
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Behind every kind action, there's a cause. Unfortunately a true gentleman is rare and often times we are confused by the meaning of gentleman. A gentleman is someone who does things without reward, no expectations, he does kind things because that's what's in his heart. So yes, he's no gentleman.
ReplyDeleteThat was a dick thing to do. Yet I admire the bravado.
ReplyDeletewhat in the world?!! boy, isn't someone quite the boy magnet lately!
ReplyDeleteNeighbor is lucky I have a sense of humor... although I suspect he wasn't trying to be funny, but passionate. Oh boy. I kept asking personal questions about his "girlfriend" and giggling, which forced him to apologize again. Then I patted him on the back as he was leaving and told him if I need another favor, I'll make sure it's in the kitchen or bathroom or no where near my bed. He was a really good sport.
ReplyDeleteMaybe you should have been a sport and gone for the sex.
ReplyDeleteOh my. You're taking this pretty well. I might have been hopping mad. I'm not too fond of people who cheat or take steps towards cheating.
ReplyDelete..it makes me wonder what he's dreaming in his slumbers..hmm, there's a time of indecision between the folding of the skirt and he wonders what she's thinking as he grabs her...hmm, in your imagination you're a thousand miles away thinking of anything but him kissing you this way...hmm, Now in his imagination all he thinks of you is what he sees and then he grabs without a thought and..twice?? ,hmmm there's no promise of a future, too many promises get broken on the way...and you tell him that it's never gonna work.......
ReplyDeletemuch more poetic coming from anonymous. "...and she wonders who comments on her blog"
ReplyDeleteby the way folks, just ran into neighbor. all is well. i'm being friendly, cool, letting him off the hook... and still giggling on the inside.